I spent this last Saturday with some friends from school, and some of their friends. I was told that they would be drinking, and asked if I was ok with that. I was. I assumed that they would have a couple of drinks with our pot luck dinner and then we would go off to the parade in downtown. Well my classmates had a couple drinks, and then one left to go somewhere else. The other stayed with the group. Her friend however drank, and drank, and then drank some more. She even put some drink in a thermos and took it to the parade.
I was stuck the entire night making sure she was safe, and didn't get lost. She clung to me the whole time because she could not walk straight. She would ramble on about stories, being wildly inappropriate and loud. I was excited and relived when another classmate of mine showed up. I thought finally re-enforcement had arrived to help me deal with the drunk I was dealing with. NOPE. He was high as a kite. I cried inside.
I was then stuck with dealing with a drunk, and a pot high friend, downtown, with loud sounds, lights and crowds of families. I did not enjoy the parade as you might imagine. The crew finally decided to leave the parade early and go back to the high friends house so they could drink some more, and use a vaporizer to get high. I went only for safety. I ended up walking one of the girls to her bus stop around midnight to make sure she could make it safely, and then myself went home late on the bus.
I thought the whole time, that this was a prime example of why I don't drink, and why I want a partner who doesn't drink either. I want to have conversations with a person, not with the alcohol. I don't want to baby sit a drunk out in public. Who thinks that is fun?
I have made it a policy not to attend parties where there is a lot of drinking going on for this very reason. I go to hang out and have fun, not babysit and watch my friends act like idiots. I'm "lucky" that I had alcoholic parents until I was 6 years old and can say "I have bad experiences with alcohol, I'd rather not attend" so I don't sound all judgmental and rude. I think that sounds better than, "To see you act like an imbecile and worry for your safety isn't fun for me."
ReplyDeletePlease don't conflate "drinking" with "being an irresponsible a**hole". True, they sometimes (often?) go hand in hand, but I know many responsible drinkers.
ReplyDeleteI've never been so drunk that I act foolish or don't remember things the next day. I've never been so drunk that I spend the next day hungover. I've never had to be baby-sat for my own safety. I've never even needed a DD (I drink moderately, allow myself time to sober up before driving, and double-check my BAC with a breath tester that I keep in the car).
But I enjoy a glass of wine when I go out to eat, or a beer or two at a barbecue, or a couple of mixed drinks when I'm at the bar for karaoke.
Drinking is not inherently bad. Alcohol abuse is.
Scott, this is why I personally clarified my own comments with "a lot of drinking." I don't have an issue with what you describe.
ReplyDelete@Kim – I had the rule not to attend parties with alcohol for so long, and this example has just reminded me why.
ReplyDelete@Scott – I know there is a difference between getting plastered and having a couple drinks with friends or dinner. I never alluded to the two being the same. I was just giving an example (one of many I have) of reasons I don't drink.
I also don't have an issue with someone drinking as you described, in fact I have gone to many a dinners with friends who do drink a little.