June 19, 2010

The Assumption

I started a new position at work for this summer. I am working a full time temp job, for someone who is retiring, until they decide if they want to rework the department or not. That's just a little background info. So working in this new department, I have been able to meet a new group of people. I work closely with the maintenance guys, cause I get work orders and distribute them out between the guys.

The initial getting to know you stage has come and gone really quickly this week. There has been something that I began to notice late last year, and had confirmed again this past week. People assume I am straight.

I am actually really proud of this fact. I like that I don't fit into any gay stereotype, (which when they get to know me more, they will begin to see some traits and other OGT's). But I am kinda happy people assume I am straight. However the presumption presents a problem.

It is almost impossible for people to know I am gay unless I tell them so. (Granted I have had a couple friends guess, because they got to know me really well, and I would drop hints for them, but in a general sense, people who don't know me 100%, don't know). But I always have to come out to someone if I want them to know. This also means I will be asked if I have a girlfriend, and I have even been asked if I am married (that shocked me the first time someone asked that, I never realized Im at that age!).

So aside from being proud I have "straight traits", and the task of coming out to people if I want to let them into my personal life, It also means some gays don't know about me, which makes flirting more difficult. (Not that I suspect anyone of the maintenance guys is gay).

At school though, most of the gay guys don't know I am gay, which excludes me from some bonding with gay guys (which I really would like). I remember my friend Konrad said once when we were driving to a bowling night that gay guys might not come talk to me because they assume I am straight.

P.S. I hope this is making sense. Whenever I write thoughts down it always gets muddled up.

What I am trying to say is gay people assume I am straight and therefore dont get to know me, because they stick to the other gay people they know.

Sorry... Now it sounds like I am complaining. I don't mean to be. I just wish I had an easier in with the gays. Or, more bluntly, that gay guys would flirt with me, cause Im so sick of making the first move (which is done to alert them to the fact I am gay).

Heck I even fail all three scientifically proven gay traits. lol

I want to hear from you:
What do you do to let guys know you're interested without being to obvious?

1 comment:

  1. I would give more attention to the person I like. I would help him and care about him. Perhaps, we would end up as being good friends.