September 16, 2009

My Friend is Placing Bets On Me

**Content May be Graphic***

I have a gay, LDS friend in Idaho.

I don't really know what else to say about him. Not that there isn't anything to say, theres just nothing you need to know that will help make this blog make any more sense.

As most of you should know, I am moving up to Portland, Oregon to begin school soon. This will be my first time away from home, not at a church school or on my mission. Portland has a HUGE gay population, and I have already made some gay friends up there.

I am a virgin. I have done somethings, but never gone all the way. I am waiting for someone I care about. When and if I meet someone, losing my virginity is still a huge deal, because I will also be willing giving up my standing in Christ's Church. That scares me.

My friend, mainly as a joke, has been betting on how long it will take me to lose my virginity. He says two weeks.

It doesn't upset me that he has been betting on my virginity, nor does it upset me he thinks I won't make it two weeks. It scares me more than anything.

Virginity is not something anyone should place bets on, particularly when it would mean giving up SO much!

I told him it wont happen till I meet the right guy. He laughs and repeats, "two weeks."

Gosh I hope he wrong. No.... He is wrong. I have lasted 22 1/2 years, I can last 22 1/2 more if I want to.


In other news I got a letter from my missionary, He told me about his new area, and also said, "Dude, we have to hang out after my mish."

I couldn't stop smiling.


  1. Wow, Quinn. I guess you've chosen your path...? I was quite sad reading your post. I'm not sure why. I'm probably just being selfish (and maybe a tad bit jealous).

    If you're going to lose your virginity, then at least do it with someone you love. This "two weeks" guy really sounds like a prick. (I'm sorry, I know he's your friend.) It doesn't sound like he respects how much weight is going into your decision to do this. He makes it sound like in two weeks you'll become another faceless gay sex maniac.

    Do it for love and companionship. You owe it to yourself.

  2. I guess my post didn't convey the right persona. I have no plans to lose my virginity AT ALL!!!! I'm just saying that IF I were too... it would have to be with someone I love. But I'm no where near that point in my life.

    As for my friend, he is doing it all in fun and jest, but with a hint of seriousness.

  3. Your post seems to assume that it's inevitable at some point. Why? I realize that the hormones are raging and they may seem irresistible. But actually they're not. They are controllable if you make the decision to do what it takes to keep them in check.

    Personally, I say let's take the Church at its word that there is one standard of morality for everyone. If you shouldn't have sex before you're married, then wait till you're married to the right guy. That way you can keep your standing in Christ's church for as long as possible, you will still arguably comply with its rules for chastity, and if you marry the man of your dreams and the church nevertheless kicks you out, you'll still have your integrity and the knowledge that when you meet the Savior, you can say you were pushed out by the misunderstandings of others, you didn't want to go, and you did your best to be true both to yourself and to Him.

  4. Just because you're gay doesn't mean you should hold yourself to a different standard, as Alan said. I was a virgin bride. Yeah, it's very uncommon in this day and age- but it is absolutely possible. You just have to make the decision. Sometimes the "gay" thing clouds the issue. It shouldn't.
    I love Portland. I lived there too- as an 18 year old right out of high school- and I didn't lose my virginity. It is possible. :)

  5. People who argue that it's "inevitable" that you'll eventually (and sooner than later) give in to temptation are usually only trying to assuage their own guilt at having done so.

    I was a virgin when I married my wife at 22, and even though I've come out to myself and to her and my feelings about gay relationships have changed, that doesn't mean my feelings about morality have. I will remain faithful to my wife, and if I ever find myself single I will abstain from sex until and unless I ever find myself married again--whether it's to a man or a woman.

    You can do the same. I know it.

  6. Quinn, many thoughts are running through my mind. A lot of good counsel given. You are in my prayers.