August 9, 2009
The Phone Call
Well, the talk I was going to have with my BFF, I had it last night.
I did not have the talk under the circumstances I wanted. I was going to go meet her at her house, and we would go on a walk to all our favorite places growing up. I would sit her down at the same spot where I cried 6 years previous and told her I was moving to another state. She would cry, I would cry and we would embrace for several minutes.
Instead I was in a car on an empty street, talking on my cell phone, gazing out over the yellow tinted street lights, to my best friend since birth, who was thousands of miles away, on an island in the Pacific, about my attraction to guys.
It wasn't how I had pictured, or how I had rehearsed it, but it was the right time and we were in the right frame of mind to talk openly and freely.
She was perfect, the girl I once had thought would be my bride, was so supportive and open minded about my attraction to men. Re-stating her support for me and desire to be there for anything I need over and over again. She also opened up and told me about some struggles she was going through. In the empty street with the yellow tinted street lights, thousand of miles apart, we were never so close.
JL, I love you so much, more than you will ever know. Remember for ever and always,
"Never give up what you want most, for what you want at the moment."
That quote will be the end of us and it will be our live saver.